You Can't Write a Eulogy for a Dog

Maybe not, but I will anyway.

We put my dog to sleep today, around 3:30pm eastern. It's about 5pm as I'm typing this sentance. We buried him in my neighbor's yard. My chest aches from the serious sobbing job I put it through a little while ago. It wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't seen his eyes roll into the back of his head as he left us. Once that happened, I completely lost it. I wanted to scream, I wanted to tell him that I loved him, but nothing would come out of my mouth except sobs. I know I'll never have a dog like him again. My parents have had plenty, and although they were all special in their own way, he was the best dog they'd ever had.

It's hard to really explain how I'm feeling right now. I know he's dead, I know he's buried, I know he's not gonna be around for me to cuddle a thousand times a day. I just don't get it...It doesn't seem possible...I guess I'll grow used to it eventually but I just have a really hard time believing that I've really lost my best friend for good. Yeah I know that I said that I cried, it's like emotionally I knew what was going on but conciously I had no idea. I don't know what I'm going to do or how I'm going to handle it. I spent some time last night making a wallpaper for our desktop in his memory. I was fine until it was finished, then I broke down and cried along with my parents.

I spent my last block in school sitting in a room with my 'big sister' Sarah.There's no way I could thank her for all she's done for me. She's always able to comfort me. I have a note she wrote me during class to help me get by, I'll always have it. She offered to help me make a scrapbook for Zoom. I don't know if I'll be able to handle it with the state I'm in but maybe sometime during vacation or on the day I have off we can get started if she doesn't work that day. A huge thank you to Sarah for keeping me sane in my time of need. I love you.

I guess I'll leave you with some pictures of my best friend, Zoom. Rest in peace buddy, I'll always love you.